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To Do, and To Stop, with ‘Imi ola

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Last night, I read something on Tim Milburn’s blog which really appealed to me, and I’m giving it to myself as a gift.

These days, I look for gifts-to-self which are not material things, for I have far too much space-taking stuff as it is, and I’m always trying to de-clutter my life. “Streamline!” is one of my favorite self-talking mantras. It gets louder each day, and a good thing it does, for it’s the mantra I seem to need the most right now.

There is information clutter too, a non-material form of stuff that is still substantial in the clutter category. You read blogs; think about how quickly new ones collect in your feed reader. When you get interested in people and their ideas, you unfortunately inherit the clutter they themselves wade through publicly with you. There are tons of lifehack blogs in our blogrolls which aim to help us focus, and cut to the chase with the best tips, however ironically these are the ones which are hardest to keep up with —have you noticed how productivity bloggers tend to be the most prolific ones, screaming for your attention several times a day? The phrase “ignorance is bliss” has never been more accurate.

What Tim wrote up, is a different sort of To Do listing that to me, is a wonderfully practical application of ‘Imi ola, the Hawaiian value of vision. It’s a To Do listing which helps you create your best possible life (the meaning of ‘Imi ola) day by day. He wrote,

“Last night, when I laid my head down on my pillow to go to sleep, I remember thinking” ‘This has been a successful day.’ ” This got me thinking: What is it that makes a day FEEL successful? I want to be able to capture that sensation so that I can lay my head down each night and experience that feeling of success.”

Boy, did he do a great job in getting me to visualize this for myself!

Tim continued with a list for him ”“ for his ‘Imi ola, and then he suggested we do the same things for our own lives, for we each have personal definition of success. We each have a ho‘ohana which is unique to us (you knew that was coming). I’m big on self-motivation and self-discipline, and Tim tied his ribbon on my gift-to-self when he added this tidbit,

“I think this is a beneficial exercise for anyone. I am more motivated and disciplined when I sense that what I’m doing has a high return ”“ that I’m being successful.”

And what I’d add, is that I’m being successful within ‘Imi ola form and function. Quite sweet.

Wow Tim, such inspiration! I know I’ll be tweaking this, but at first draft here’s mine. Tim listed 10 items, but I’m stopping at these 7 to increase my chances of accomplishing them all!

My ‘Imi ola Daily To Do List:

  1. Learn, teach, and coach as a whole process, even if with self. In my ho‘ohana, this is quite a big win when this gets shared with someone else (as a process they can use too). Not only do I sleep well, I dream well! I wake up eager to start a new day again.
  2. Give the Daily Five Minutes, for it keeps my MWA laboratory concocting more goodness. It also keeps me in the real-time workplace Aloha coaching I do across a cross-section of different industry, not just mine.
  3. Read and Write. This one-two punch and tactile pleasure delights me as my absolute best creative process.
  4. Complete something I’ve procrastinated about or have not been able to get to for good reason. Checking a task off and completing projects is pure heaven. Sweet closure.
  5. Get some exercise, preferably outdoors. I am truly keiki o ka ‘āina; child of the land, thriving on sense of place. Nature nourishes me, and fills me with the wonder which keeps me youthful in my curiosity, and humble as I witness God’s majesty.
  6. Serve. Be there for someone; keep a promise or fulfill a commitment. I freely admit to you that I’m great at taking care of myself, whereas this one takes more deliberate effort, thus it’s a must for this list!
  7. ‘ÅŒpala ‘ole; banish the clutter in my life so I can enlarge my capacities and live with more meaningful abundance. So I can give more.

Now in my case, I know I need something to balance and fortify this. I get distracted too easily, and the freedom I do have in my life has obliterated the boundaries that serve as better structure for most people. Therefore, I’m taking this further.

My ‘Imi ola Stop Doing List:

(For sanity sake, this one is more of a daily-or-weekly mix to start. I sense I will need to develop a good rhythm with stopping!)

  1. No un-timed, un-planned web surfing. Computer time is just as bad if not worse than couch-potato time… just another screen. [In my case the computer IS the culprit; I don’t watch much tv at all.]
  2. No email inbox filing. That means I’m missing the boat with numbers 4. 6. and 7. in my To DO list above. If I don’t get to that empty inbox nirvana at the end of each day, I have GOT to do so in my Weekly Review. Which brings me to the next thing.
  3. No skipping of my Weekly Review. Without it, I lose trust in “my system” and my breakdowns and glitches start multiplying like rabbits. Hmmm” is that where the phrase ‘rabbit trails’ comes from? Makes perfect sense.
  4. No impulsive decisions. Decisiveness is natural to me, and as a strange bedfellow to the closure thing, I do take action quickly, sometimes too quickly. In particular, I’m learning to reshape my habits with this in regard to the business planning process I’m going through now. Finding this balance is hard for me, but I am making progress and this list will serve as a constant reminder.
  5. Stop interrupting people. I get pretty excited once I start engaging in conversations with others, and I need to calm down, listen more, and continually practice being more patient. Auwe… patience has never, ever been one of my virtues.
  6. Never start a day without a feasible, pragmatic plan that will better enable the best honoring of the hard and soft landscape on my calendar. If you know GTD or my MWA3P you know exactly what I mean. I’m a planner; there’s no denying how it works for me.
  7. No solitary days. I can very, very easily slip into this one with the solo entrepreneur’s life I lead, and I feel so much better with the human touch of interaction ”“ not only do I feel better, I AM a better person; more whole.

This is what I’m going to do next:

  • Print up this long version, and stick it in the journal I write in daily, so I can do the writer’s live-with-it-and-edit-it thing I do.
  • Print up a short version in two columns, one column per list, with both on a single page. I’ll print it, put it in a page protector. Three copies. One for the briefcase I take everywhere with me, one for my home office, and one for my O‘ahu office.
  • Read ‘em and do ‘em daily, until I BE ‘em.

New habit creation, here I come. Quite a gift Tim, mahalo nui! Looks like you have given me my best birthday gift this year!

Your turn Ho‘ohana Community, what will be on your lists?

The master in the art of living makes little distinction between his work and his play, his labor and his leisure, his mind and his body, his information and his recreation, his love and his religion.
He hardly knows which is which.
He simply pursues his vision of excellence at whatever he does, leaving others to decide whether he is working or playing.
To him he is always doing both.

— James Michener

Content or Discontent – Which Tent Do You Live In?

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Whichtent
I don’t like to live on the fence,
But I find that I often live in two tents.

-Quote from The Arabian Prince of Camdelay*

There is a paradox in learning.  It is the paradox of the two tents.

On one side are those who are content.  On the other dwell those who live in discontent.   It appears that both have something to teach us about learning.

The content people have discovered that there is more to life than
acquiring enough possessions to keep up with everyone else.  They can
smile in the midst of life’s storms.  They are gracious in the moments
of life’s rewards.  They are like a man named Paul**, who was shackled
in a prison cell when he wrote the words…

"I’ve learned by now to be
quite content whatever my circumstances. I’m
just as happy with little as with much, with much as with little. I’ve
found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or
hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through
anything…"

Being content doesn’t come naturally, it’s not simply a matter of genetic disposition.  One must learn
to be content.  It is in the circumstances and experiences of living that
I am finding the lessons of contentedness.  The content person lives
with an internal sense of security that is fueled by the understanding
that "what happens to me isn’t as important as what happens in me."
Contentedness is a matter of character and integrity.  The content
person has learned to live with him or herself everyday, not reacting
to life, but rather, responding to it with an intentionality and
purpose. 

"Until you make peace with who you are, you’ll never be
content with what you have." – Doris Mortman

But there’s another side to this thing: the discontent people have something to teach me as well.

Continue Reading

Heifetz and Milburn on Leadership

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Mustering the courage to interrogate reality is a central function of a leader. And that requires the courage to face three realities at once. First, what values do we stand for — and are there gaps between those values and how we actually behave?

-Ronald Heifetz


This is huge.  Early on, I began to understand that people want to be a certain way, but they often act in ways that go against their desires.  It’s the difference between actual values and desired values.  A person may have a desired value of honesty, but in reality, they may cheat a little, lie a little, and act in a way counter to the value that they speak so highly of.  It is a subtle issue of character.  A person can begin to live with a perceived self (fantasy) that is actually different than one’s real self.  A leader is one who can enter a situation and point out the differences between hoping to act with certain values and actually implementing those values.

-Tim Milburn

At student.inc, Tim Milburn of our Ho‘ohana Community has written an exceptional article called Leadership Is The Courage To Face Reality. The above excerpt about values is but one of the gems he shares. Do click over and read what Tim has to say.

By the way, if you know of an emerging Student Leader – or are one – Tim’s site is a must read and must recommend. Coinciding with the beginning of the school year, Tim recently began a series on the The Six Seasons Of A Student Leader Year. He starts by explaining,

One of the more unique aspects of student leadership is the amount of time that each student commits to his or her position – typically one year.

That’s the beauty of the student leadership laboratory.  One year to accomplish something significant.  One year to learn to become a better leader.  One year to invest in the lives of others through one’s position and influence.

One year.

He then gives a short preview of the Six Seasons he calls Anticipation, Implementation, Fluctuation, Evalutation, Determination, and Separation. A post will be dedicated to each, so follow along in Tim’s free course.

Come to think of it, I need to tell Chris about it.

Lead Your Learners To Better Thinking

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Throughout this month’s Ho’ohana emphasis on learning, I have been thinking about what and how I am learning.  But oftentimes, I am on the other side of the table, working with student leaders, trying to enhance and direct their learning. 

Sometimes the lines are often blurred between student and teacher.  It’s hard to tell who’s doing the learning and who’s doing the teaching.  The journey through the material together usually ends up showing all of us something that we hadn’t seen before.

But there are situations where I must stand in front of students with a message, a lesson, an exercise that will stimulate their learning.  It is during these times that I want to make the most of my opportunity to teach in such a way that the students will make the most of their opportunity to learn.

I’ve used many of the following tips as a way to engage students in the learning process.  Whether you teach college students, jr high students, or a board room full of executives, these are effective practices:

Call on students randomly, not just those who have raised hands.

Ask broad, open questions.  "Yes/No" questions are easy to answer without any real thought.

Utilize "think-pair-share." Give each individual two minutes to think, two minutes to discuss with a partner, then open up the class for discussion.  It is proven that if you can get a person to talk and dialogue in a small group setting, they’ll be more comfortable in expressing their ideas to the larger group.

Remember "wait time."  Use ten to twenty seconds following a question that requires students to think.  Become comfortable with the awkward silence that students need to process what you’re teaching.

Ask follow-up questions.  Questions like, "Why?", "Do you agree?", "Can you elaborate?", "Tell me more.", "Can you give me an example?"

Withhold judgement. Respond to student answers in a non-evaluative fashion.  At certain points in the dialogue it is appropriate to get students sharing and offering feedback, even if their answers are off-base.  If you immediately correct their responses, they will be less apt to participate.

Ask for summary statements.  This promotes active listening.  Asking students to summarize what someone else has just said or what you have just taught them.

Survey the class.  Ask your students something like, "How many people agree with Trish’s interpretation?" (thumbs up, thumbs down).

Allow for students to call on others.  This way, students can involve others without you being the one to invite students into the conversation all of the time ("Richard, would you please call on someone else to respond?")

Take issue with your students.  Require them to defend their reasoning against different points of view.  Some would call this the "devil’s advocate" position.  It may not be that you disagree with your student’s response, but you want them to consider their position against an opposing view.

Ask students to "unpack their thinking."  This asks to students to describe their thought processes involved in arriving at a certain conclusion.  You are asking them to "think out loud" for the rest of the class.

Have students ask questions of their own.  Questions will provide opportunites for clarification, as well as, a chance for you to discover how much of the material your students have internalized and understood.

Whether teacher or student, the important thing to remember is that we usually take away from an experience what we’re willing to put into it.  Involvement, engagement, and application are crucial characteristics of an effective learning experience.

Postcript by Rosa: You can always find Tim Milburn, our Guest Author today, within the right-column listing of our Ho’ohana Online Community. Tim is the author of studentl.inc. His ho’ohana is developing lifelong leaders, one student at a time.

Want more of Tim? Tim’s first post for our Ho‘ohana on Lifelong Learning this month was Are You A Learner?