Talking Story

Starting new conversations in the workplace!

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Must I work this bit alone?

September 14, 2011 by Rosa Say

This is a question I’d love to have more people ask themselves, asking it not in a general way, but with much more specificity, action by action, decision by decision.

Who can give you your second opinion?
Who can tip those aha! moments you have when you get stuck at work?
Who can you bounce an idea off of, feeling free to question it, or laugh about it?
Who might champion it with you, adding their unbridled enthusiasm to your own?
Who can you learn from?
Who can brighten your day in moments with their presence?

More often than not, the answer to these questions will be, “Come to think of it, several people can.” You simply need to get out of your chair (or away from your work station, whatever the case may be) and go to them. Break your orbit and be more comet-like.

An ‘Imi ola life — that ‘best possible’ life — is NOT a solo proposition.

Another way to ask this collection of questions, would be, Where’s the Aloha?
…and, Are you getting some, and giving some?
[ Your Aloha Spirit, Tightly Curled and Regal ]

One of the reasons I’m so bullish on The Daily Five Minutes, stems from the alarming trending I continually see in ‘digitally savvy’ workplaces toward solitary, independent work. I call this the “Downtown yet No Town” weirdness, because in my workplace visits, people will continually tell me how they feel the cubicle mentality still thrives, and is in fact, their world: They go to work each day, and sit at a workstation or in their office with nose to the grindstone as much as 95% of their day. Scary. And sad. Thanks to email, texting and social media (yes, I’m being sarcastic, for it’s no thanks), they aren’t even on the telephone much anymore. I push D5M with them because I know of its power in getting people together again, simply starting with getting out and about, to Hō‘imi — to actively look for those 5 minutes of found time when they can converse with another human being face to face.

“I dress up for work even tho i hide behind my desk all day.” — mmmony on Tumblr

Forget all the D5M framing if you must — just talk to people more.

Conversation, talking story, and good habits like The Daily Five Minutes are ‘Imi ola triggers: They will elevate the quality of your day, for all work — all good, feels good work — is some balanced execution of what we do on our own and what we do with others. As a workplace culture coach, much of the workplace unhappiness and discontent I see, is clearly the result of an imbalance toward the solitary, where people feel they go it alone. They might be surrounded by other people, but they feel alone most of the time — “Downtown, yet No Town.”

A good number of managers look to solve this by focusing on team dynamics, and yes, by all means, keep group interaction dynamic and vibrant too. Have good huddles. Bring back the staff meeting. Learn to love projects. But understand that people may still feel they disappear in the chaos of a whole team: We all need one-on-one time. If you must choose one over the other, focus on improving your one-to-ones, whether with D5M or other kinds of in-person conversation.

There is so much to be gained from collaborative work, starting with that simple act of asking another person for their opinion — their sharing of knowledge, with you.

Huddle up: We’re Building Sense of Place

July 26, 2010 by Rosa Say

A few thoughts to connect to the character of your workplace”

“He built a park in the enclave — in what had been a garbage dump — because ‘parks do great things. If you put in swings, a soccer field or basketball court, you get kids and they learn social skills and motor skills. If you put in benches, you get older people watching the kids. If you put in tables, you get families having picnics, and later you get lovers who have no place to go.’”

— Sara Davidson quoting Ed Wayne, an American building community places in other countries he contributes to, where it is easier (than in America) to ignore red tape, not ask permission, and just get good things done quickly.

Share this quote in your next team huddle, and then talk about these questions in one of these two contexts:

  1. Building sense of place for your business — focus on building a park for your customer
  2. Building sense of place for your workplace — focus on building a park for your team

Better yet, do it twice, so you can cover both possibilities. Lavish on the new ideas!

~ Where is your ‘garbage dump‘ — that pocket of space within your place that can be pulled out of neglect or disregard, be re-purposed, and somehow beautified?

~ Where is your ‘park‘ — that pocket of probable capacity within your place where you find the ‘great things’ happen with most frequency or predictability?

~ Where can you ‘put in swings, a soccer field or basketball court’ (metaphorically) so that ‘you get kids‘ — the childlike curiosity and eagerness within which adults-at-work can also ‘learn social skills and motor skills’ anew?
~~ What will be those ‘swings, a soccer field or basketball court’ you choose, and why?

~ Where can you put in more ‘benches,’ for more observation, for more breathing/resting space, and for more conversation? Are there great places to sit?

~ Where can you put in more tables? How could you better relocate a table you already have? What can you place on it, or surround it with? What clutter should be removed?

Blue Chair Learning, Redux

How do you define a great meeting?

May 20, 2010 by Rosa Say for Say “Alaka‘i”

Andy Stanley said, “The best thing a leader can bring to his team is his energy.” (quoting Bill Hybels)… another reason that I’d encouraged you to Ho‘ohui: Huddle up, and Bring back the staff meeting:

Having regularly scheduled staff meetings has become a no-no, something we avoid like the plague in workplaces. Why?

Boycotting staff meetings is absurd. Meetings are not a problem dear manager; bad meetings are. And make no mistake; you need them.

The solution is simple: Have good meetings!

I left that last statement as is, so how so? How do you have a good meeting?

Photo credit: “God, I hope we get to perform this sometime” by Nosha on Flickr

To have the noun, define the verb

I think you have to very simply define that word ‘meeting’ by thinking about why you have them at all. Fact of the matter is that meetings exist in organizational structures like some brick or pillar which has been in the building forever, but is no longer foundational or even functional. It’s just there as part of the cultural auto-pilot.

I talked about this a little bit with David Zinger, the employee engagement guru, and he said that if he was chairing a meeting, he’d be sure to “Sit at the same level, be part of the circle, listen to all voices, care about relationships and results.”

That tells me David wants to really hear from the people there with him: He is starting with his why. Starting that way takes him directly to his action verbs as a leader.

From a contextual standpoint, a good meeting is a great conversation involving more people. I like to keep it simple, and define meetings that way because it reminds me to honor the conversation part and make sure it is ever-present in my meeting agendas. It helps me treat each meeting as a brand new event — who is coming? i.e. Who are my guests? — so that I focus on individuals versus audience.

But those are my whys, and it’s okay if your energy-creating (leading) or energy-channeling (managing) why is different: Just be sure it is intentional.

So this posting is not going to offer you a listing of all the elements that go into constructing a great meeting agenda: that would be condescending I think. As an Alaka‘i Manager you can take care of content. My advice is to define your why.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

sayalakai_rosasayMy mana‘o [The Backstory of this posting]
Each Thursday I write a management posting for Say “Alaka‘i” at Hawai‘i’s newspaper The Honolulu Advertiser. If this is the first you have caught sight of my Say “Alaka‘i” tagline, you can learn more on this Talking Story page: About Say “Alaka‘i”. There are some differences in this Talking Story version, most notably that all links will keep you here on this blog.

Bring Back the Staff Meeting

May 18, 2010 by Rosa Say for Say “Alaka‘i”

Having regularly scheduled staff meetings has become a no-no, something we avoid like the plague in workplaces. Why?

Boycotting staff meetings is absurd. Meetings are not a problem dear manager; bad meetings are. And make no mistake; you need them.

The solution is simple: Have good meetings!

Before we jump to any how-to (something you can probably figure out on your own anyway) let’s talk story today about why you should have them.

How this is jumped on my radar

A feature I’ve loved with using Google Calendar is that you can have several calendars, each for their own specific purpose, merged together on one weekly view in a pleasing color-coded rainbow of productivity. Very useful.

One of my favorites has been a ‘green light’ calendar I call “Personal Intersection.” I’ve used it for logging the recurring staff meetings of my Say Leadership Coaching customers, and workplaces I’m aware of which actively use and practice Managing with Aloha. These are the people of the “in real life” Aloha and Ho‘ohana movements I want to actively support as much as is personally possible for me — and here’s the key, when it’s also rhythmically useful for them.

This is how I use it: When I’m in town (which in Hawai‘i often translates to “on their island”) and happen to have a morning or afternoon block free, I check who might have a staff meeting then, pick up the phone and ask to be invited, asking if I can stop by and sit in to support them, or if they like, to give a short 10-minute whiteboard lesson on whatever MWA value-alignment they wish to revisit. I do this for free. They don’t have to ask, because I offer, knowing that I will love being there with them in their working with Aloha laboratory. It’s been a great way to optimize my travel schedule.

This has been getting harder to do. Imagine that: Hard to give away free presentations or responsiveness coaching because I’ve been hearing that, “We don’t have staff meetings anymore.”

Huddle by Arne Hendriks on Flickr

A recurrence is predictable scheduling convenience

Now I have terrific customers. Because they embody Aloha they always welcome my visits and do whatever they can to get their team together. But I tend to call them less often than before if I feel I’m  intruding, precisely because I don’t want them going out of their way for me. I want to intersect and blend in, not interrupt and disrupt.

People are so polite, and they don’t  say no, even when they should. And I certainly don’t want to call attention to something which is now glaringly missing for you. Okay, maybe I do, but I’m writing this to be more proactive than reactionary about it!

Those recurrences, where everyone in an organization knows that you meet for a sacred hour or so every week are human touchpoints; they are huddles which add invaluable ‘social currency’ to the emotional bank account of workplace teams.

If you honor that as the ‘Why?’ you have meetings, how you have them, and what they’re about will follow, form for function. People will not dread attending each week if your staff meetings become a time they go to the well and recharge, because you’ve made them a source of energy, inspiration, and their opportunity to connect on a regular basis without having to schedule something special.

Instead of boycotting workplace meetings, improve them

Bring back your staff meetings, and make them interesting and useful.

I’m purposely excluding the word ‘creative’ here too: Creative approaches to meeting reinvention can totally miss the mark, because we get distracted and off-point with silly surface fixes that are cosmetic and meaningless. You know what I mean: ‘manufactured play’ can insult the value people place on the time they give you by merit of their attention.

I get that recessionary times have caused you to look for efficiencies, I really do. But consider the price of omission. And by all means, say “No, can we try again next time?” to visitors like me when you need to own your agendas, or if my version of ‘given for free’ will actually cost you in some way.

So huddle up: Bring back your staff meetings and have them be a place your people plug in and get charged up. You cannot sacrifice getting your team together on a regular basis to converse and collaborate in person socially, and without added production: Staff meetings are part of that intangible worth within Sense of Workplace belonging.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Archive Aloha: Here’s a Take 5 of related postings:

  1. 3 Ways Managers Create Energetic Workplaces
  2. Sense of Workplace: It’s Milk, Maslow and You
  3. Drink your Kool-aid
  4. So, you think you’re approachable huh?
  5. D5M-ing your Decisions: See with your ears

Check out the post tags for more.

Update: My stats tell me that someone has been coming back to this post due to a search for “rules of engagement.” So Arlington, Virginia, this is for you, just in case you happen to return: What you’re looking for might be found here: The Real Rules of Engagement at my Tumblr.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

sayalakai_rosasayMy mana‘o [The Backstory of this posting]
Each Tuesday I write a leadership posting for Say “Alaka‘i” at Hawai‘i’s newspaper The Honolulu Advertiser and will add copies to Talking Story when they blend nicely with our conversations here. If this is the first you have caught sight of my Say “Alaka‘i” tagline, you can learn more on this Talking Story page: About Say “Alaka‘i”. There are some differences in this Talking Story version, most notably that most of my hyperlinks will keep you here on this blog.

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